I’m sharing the 3rd post in our travel series today! If you missed the first two, you can find them here:
How We Pack for Trips
7 Tips for Navigating airports + flying with kids
If it’s your first time traveling with kids, one of the things you tend to overthink and even worry about is how they’ll do with the time change and interrupted schedule while you’re away. I know this because I am this person. 😉 But what I’ve realized the more we travel is that kids are actually more resilient to change than we are. For all the worrying and prepping I’ve done about working in naps and planning out days, our kids have rallied and totally surprised me numerous times with how well they handle being outside of their normal routines. And I say “me” here because Matt just doesn’t worry. He was made for family vacations. 😂
So what I would say first is do your best to create days that are manageable without completely missing out on the opportunities to experience your vacation simply because you want a 3-hour nap window with your kids in cribs or beds every day. Take some risks in this department. Plan out your days so that there’s a car ride or long walk in the stroller right around that nap window and adjust the rest of the day accordingly if that window falls through. Trust me when I say this is not the end of the world, and you stressing about whether your kids are rested does not actually help them rest or help anyone in your traveling party enjoy their time away. Again, speaking from experience here. 😉
Also keep in mind as you go into your vacation that any trip, no matter how short or long, is inevitably going to throw off your regular routine. This happens even if you travel alone. It’s just a part of the package, and usually routines are interrupted because memories are being made, so hand over the reigns of strict routines and let yourself go with the flow a bit while you’re away. Once you get over the fear of not following your typical at-home routine, you’ll likely surprise yourself with how well you and everyone else handles it all.
Now let’s talk about a few specifics regarding planning out flights, drives, what each day will look like, how “flexing” changes with newborns or babies on a feeding schedule, and how to adjust the day on the spot when one plan falls through.
1. Planning out flight/driving times
I mentioned this in our previous travel series post about flying with kids, but when possible, we try to plan our flights around nap time. Getting to the airport and through the airport involves a lot of stimulation, energy, and sometimes sensory overload for kids (and adults, hah) that works well for getting their little bodies ready for rest. Depending on the length and time of the flight, we choose a general time around their typically nap window that we’ll put away any books, snacks, devices or toys and set the kids up for rest time. If you read our post on flying, you know we’ve traveled on planes with our carseats for longer flights to help create a better napping environment, but you know your kids best and can decide whether carseats are necessary for naps or whether naps are even necessary at all.
When we flew to Maine, that day involved a 3-hour flight and then a 3-hour drive directly following. For that trip, we thought it was best to fly early and have nap time in the car, so we planned the flight time accordingly.
Depending on the ages and personalities of your kids, you might decide to skip naps all together, but I would try to create a low-key, early evening for your travel day if you do this. Nobody wants to start the trip off over-tired and cranky!
2. Planning each day
Before you leave for your trip, I would generally plan out the big activities you have for each day with a “down day” in the middle of the trip. When we flew to San Diego last Spring, we knew we wanted to visit Disneyland, Sea World, the San Diego Zoo, and have a day to spend at the beach or the children’s museum.
Because of the 3-hour time change, we assumed our kids would likely wake up around 4am our first day there, so we planned to go to Disneyland on our first day, knowing that it was about a 1.5 hour drive from La Jolla where we were staying and knowing we wanted to be in line when the parks opened.
We decided to follow our first day with Sea World and have two full-days back-to-back with the San Diego zoo on our third day, knowing we could use strollers here and give the kids more rest time if they needed it as we walked around and explored.
We saved exploring the beach and La Jolla area for our last full day and didn’t make any plans outside of exploring, which proved to be a great choice for the last day as the kids got to meet other kids at our hotel and play with them on the beach for most of the day with a long stroller walk mid-day that allowed them to nap and Matt and I to have a semi-day date on our trip. 😉
So decide what your kids are capable of handling and be careful to carve out time for earlier bedtimes or rest times when needed to avoid epic meltdowns. And if crazy long days are unavoidable and those epic meltdowns happen, just remember they’re going to pass, and at least you’re getting to experience that moment in a cool place instead of at home. You know they happen anywhere, so might as well find the positive in the moment and give grace for extra tired actions.
3. Newborns and feeding/sleeping schedules
If you are traveling with a little one who is on a set schedule like Moms on Call, keep the feeds times and flex the nap times. If you are a first-time parent, this will totally freak you out. You are normal. But you will soon learn that if a baby is fed, they are wayyy more flexible with where they sleep and when they get their sleep than we give them credit for. I would just keep mental notes about how long a nap lasts and try to let the days’ total sleep (naps+bedtime) stay in line with their normal number of hours. For example, I know Moms on Call says wake them up after 2 hours of napping, but if the night before they got way less sleep because you were out later, let that morning nap go longer without changing up the feed time.
And sleep on vacation can be in a carseat, a stroller, a wrap… whatever works. I promise they’ll sleep if they’re tired, even if they fuss a little longer because they’re used to a crib. You got this. Also, don’t let yourself freak out about the exact bedtime routine. If you can’t get in a bath, lavender lotion massage, 3 stories, and 2 songs, everyone will survive. But don’t forget the sound machine. 😉
4. Adjusting the day as needed
There will be times when things fall apart momentarily. Don’t beat yourself up about this and try your best to hold it together and show extra grace for your little travelers.
On our San Diego trip, our kids seriously ROCKED 98% of that vacation. Matt and I literally laughed at how well the flights and most full days went. But there was one day, day 3, when it all hit the fan for about 20-30 minutes when we got back to our hotel. That sounds like such a short amount of time when it’s written out, but any parent knows that 5 minutes of melt downs feels like 30, so 30ish minutes did not feel insignificant in the moment. Everyone was exhausted and the dinner we ate totally missed the mark for toddler taste buds, so we basically had an all-fail stretch as we were nearing bedtime. And I completely beat myself up over this and was so frustrated that I didn’t think through the timing or meal selection better to avoid that tough stretch.
And here’s what I learned: this does nothing to help the situation and is entirely pointless. The best thing you can do in those times is not say a word, let everyone have their moments, and work toward getting everyone fed and in bed without addressing the behavior at all. Nobody (toddler or adult) wants to hear how to handle themselves better when they’re in the middle of losing it. It’s just not helpful or productive. Especially when you know it’s coming from pure exhaustion. So in those moments, just work to get everyone in bed and remember the moment will pass and tomorrow is another day.
Okay, wow, didn’t mean for that to be an entire novel. Hopefully you found something helpful in all those words! And I think we have the comments fixed, so if you have any questions or suggestions from your own experiences, feel free to share them in the comments below!
